I've never met him, but I love the sound of Jonathan Durden - the 'D' in media giant PHD.

He once spent 18 days in the Big Brother house, had his drink and drug problems chronicled by the tabloids, and sold himself as an escort “for the hell of it”. And his life has been touched by tragedy.

Now he's written a novel, which contains a lot of fun material, but he apparently confessed to writing it in a month, which sorta shows.

Sample sentence: "He had hugged her with gratitude, since dealing with medical emergencies (along with cleaning up bodily fluids) filled him with an urgent desire to rush to the nearest airport and book a one-way flight to Gdansk, Bolivia or Alaska."

Not terrible, but Nabokov's position is safe.

I just wish he'd written "Alaska, Peru or Gdansk." In a list of three, you don't have two place-names ending in 'a'. And it's so much better to end on a stressed syllable.